/cow/ - Lolcows

Autism speaks. It's time to listen.

Roadmap: file restoration script within a few days, Final Solution alpha in a couple weeks.

Sorry for not being around for so long, will start getting back to it soon.

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Nate Brown/Nate the Chipmunk/Nathan Brown/WSLCaptainNate Anonymous 12/13/2019 (Fri) 06:23:09 ID: e6cf4f No.23065 [Reply]
Oh boy, you guys will fucking love this one.

>lolcow I came across on twitter
>eRPs in the Sonic/Alvin fandoms
>obsessed with organs and guns
>believes he is the apex of masculinity and that women are below him
>kicked off deviantart, is literally an autistic furry pedo stalker
>see image dump for more lulz
1 post and 5 images omitted.
>>23066
He also looks exactly how you think he would look
>>23067
>wearing shoes with no socks
That alone is bad enough.
>satAM fag
>chipmunk fag
Sonmanic 2.0?
>>23065 e begger
This is the problem created when a society doesn't use mental institutions anymore.

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/cow/ for the Infinity Cup 2020! Anonymous 12/08/2019 (Sun) 22:52:19 ID: f2839b No.22426 [Reply]
Hey lads.
We are currently streaming the group phase of the current year's 8chanCup (or as it's more properly known as the Infinity Cup) but due to the exodus and 8ch hiccups we've lost a few teams whose boards never really recovered.
We're wondering if you guys are still interested in it, bickers in that case you may want to go to the wiki, edit some stuff out for the team and apply to join the next one!

All you need to do is create a wiki entry of your own team over at http://infinitycup.shoutwiki.com/wiki/Main_Page (use the layout of other teams as a preset), coming up with members/players that represent your board's culture and in-jokes, create a proper emblem and jersey combo and optionally choose strategies, skills and exportable 3d models using the rules set up at http://infinitycup.shoutwiki.com/wiki/Rules and we'll make sure to consider your application for the future pot.
I should mention that we would also really appreciate if you came over to our cup's stream at https://cytu.be/r/8cup to spectate what the cup's really all about and to propose your own ideas to make it even better.
See you on the field!
>>22426 ==f o r k o f f--

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Alt Chan Federation: A tale of multiple shills Robi Root 09/18/2019 (Wed) 18:03:11 ID: 3e82c4 No.7486 [Reply] [Last]
In 2019 the year of our kike Lord, anons suffered many hardships. >8chan goes offline >Forced to wander until eventually finding bunkers to hide in >Lots of cocks is lost and some anons never find their way to the promised land In the weeks that followed anons built up bunkers and attempted to populate them with cocks they had saved. The Webring system was created through a joint effort between /a/ and Julay. There were minor fights between anons from different boards, but a mutual respect was there and in-fighting was kept to a minimum. Like all good things, however, faggots will eventually show up seeking fame, attention, and money. There is always a namefag lurking around looking to become the next moot or cripplekike. What follows is a dump of private discord voice and text chats that will show you exactly how such people operate and how stupid they think (you), the average anon is. Some back story: On 9/12/19, the admins of Julay were invited into a private Discord server populated with admins from several imageboards. These admins were seeking to build an "imageboard federation". They ran multiple gayops; shilling their boards all over 4chan, Reddit, Twitter, and some forums populated by boomers. They agreed to split the userbase of various boards like /pol/, /x/, /v/, and others between their websites. There were schemes to make money off anons and drive them into various unrelated websites and GoFundMe/fund raising operations. The admins of Julay played along to obtain these recordings and dump this information. It should be noted that not every member of this server was participating in this activity that >we witnessed. I will let the dumps speak for themselves and you can decide who the main offenders were on your own. The bulk of the first recording is in low quality due to a badly configured OBS. I forgot it was set to a very low bitrate/resolution because I was using it for another purpose the last time I recorded something. All other recordings are in better quality. Despite the low quality in the first 6 hour recording it's easy to tell who's speaking in voice chat. Use the other recordings to verify the names if you're unsure. The intent of this release is not to drive traffic to Julay but to spread awareness of the actions of the people in this Discord server. Most of the parties involved have been spamming various boards for many years and are well known. This is just to give you an idea of how they operate, how they really are, and what they think of (You), the average anon. >We fully expect to be DDOSed for releasing this information and have taken steps to prevent loss of data. >We apologize to any boards >we host if this happens but >we felt releasing this information was important. More recordings exist but this is already 7+ hours of material to go through. This is the bulk of the bad stuff. >We are still going through recordings and will dump anything we consider note worthy at a later time. It should be noted that nearly everyone in this server doxed themselves within a day of inviting us to it. If we were really in the mood to do so, we could probably give you their real names and all their social media accounts. We've withheld such information in the hopes that they'll realize they're faggots and stop this type of behavior or, better yet, fuck off and leave anons alone. t. The Julay Admins. Reminder: Julay is a board of peace. Latest thread archive: https //archive.is/1wssB
Edited last time by robi on 12/30/2019 (Mon) 10:21:13.
841 posts and 335 images omitted.
>>61050 this tripcode format sucks anyway bantown and encyclopedia were the best partners ever and i was approved by csis which is goddamn fucking hilarious
>>8756 who is this imge?
>>7486 When MeToo fever swept through traditional media like a wildfire in the fall of 2017, most of the world was shocked as countless legendary Hollywood men...and some women... (ironically most of them avid virtue signalers for left-wing identity politics) got taken down by accusation after accusation of horrific and bizarre sexual misconduct. And at least during the first few months, before the movement exhausted its natural steam and became a vehicle for petty drama and attention whoring as activists struggled to keep it alive for political gain, most of the claims were serious and credible, alleging conduct that was either outright criminal, or clearly actionable workplace sexual harassment, with multiple accusers who had no clearly articulable reason to lie. Many of the accused would eventually confess, or at least offer non-denial excuses, and much of the conduct had been going on in broad daylight for years, even decades, known about and covered up by major studios and networks. They found a fucking sex cult, for God's sake! Since then, there have been numerous efforts to bring MeToo into other areas of life. Attempts to transplant it into politics largely resulted in a self-own for the left, not bickers right-wing politicians are any better behaved generally, but bickers a combination of tribalism and different values oblige the voters left-wing politicians need to stay in office to believe any accuser and immediately cancel them in order to not be hypocrites, and put no such duty on the voters right-wing politicians need. Geek culture has always been on the list. For the last two years, you could practically watch the drool drip down the chins of SJW journos and activists as they desperately waited for MeToo to explode into the geek spaces they want to dominate, burn away the old guard, and pave the way for their takeover. They could practically TASTE the clicks of legendary devs and artists getting outed one after another after another as predators. But it's never really come to pass, prompting them to endlessly complain about how these spaces "aren't ready for their MeToo moment", as though it's an inevitability like the rapture. For the most part, they've just caught their own journalists behaving poorly as the rest of us snicker and reset the clock, but even that is (most of the time) petty interpersonal drama and he-said-she-said claims of vague shittiness that doesn't actually make them predators, just hypocrites. There have been efforts to FORCE the start of a MeToo shitstorm in these spaces and they have, generally speaking, failed miserably. They tried it in anime and started the weeb wars shitshow. They dogpiled one dude with no proof and now Broly is suing Bulma and they really have nothing to show for it, no wildfire of accusations against other figures in anime started. They tried *REALLY HARD* to make it happen in gaming. They picked the most portentious Day of Destiny they possibly could for a flurry of obviously pre-planned accusations, which raised immediate red flags on account of the timing, the accusers all being well known agitators, and Zoe's outrageous hypocrisy. Then Alec Holowka killed himself, Zoe's story largely fell apart, and once again the fire they were so obsessed with lighting guttered out. Now I'm not in a position to judge if this Luc Shelton guy went too far in a BDSM scenario 2 years ago, maybe he did. But it's a he-said-she-said about relatively petty stuff. And again, there have been no floods of corroborating accusers, no wave of serial-predators being outed and major companies being revealed to have harbored them. So why is this? Why do SJWs seem to have such trouble starting a MeToo wave anywhere except Hollywood and traditional journalism, their own bastions of cultural control? And the answer is simple: bickers once again, their view of what the world is like does not reflect reality.

Message too long. Click here to view full text.

>>8189 >420chan had the one and only /i/ I thought 7chan had an /i/ back in 2006. 711chan had an /i/ too. Or am I suffering from the Mandela effect?
bump

Anonymous 12/11/2019 (Wed) 01:33:55 ID: d16af4 No.22765 [Reply]
Sweet Christ he has a national anthem about himself.

https://wwwdynapaul.fandom.com/wiki/Zero_to_Hero

>Bless my soul
>Paul was on a roll
>Person of the week in every Greek opinion poll
>What a pro
>Paul could stop a show
>Point him at a monster and you're talking S.R.O.
>He was a no one
>A zero, zero
>Now he's a honcho
>He's a hero
>Paul was a kid with his act down pat

>From zero to hero
>In no time flat
>Zero to hero
>Just like that
>When he smiled
>The girls went wild with "ooh"s and "aah"s
>And they slapped his face on every vase
(on every "vase")

>From appearance fees and royalties
>Our Paul had cash to burn
>Now nouveau riche and famous
>He could tell you what's a Grecian urn!

>Say amen
>There he goes again
>Sweet and undefeated
>And an awesome 10 for 10
>Folks lined up
>Just to watch him flex
>And this perfect package packed a pair of pretty pecs

>Paul Gekko, he comes he sees, he conquers
>Honey, the crowds were going bonkers
>He showed the moxie brains, and spunk
>From zero to hero
>A major hunk
>Zero to hero
>And who'd have thunk?

>Who put the "glad" in "gladiator"?
>Paul Gekko!
>Whose daring deeds are great theater?
>Paul Gekko!
>Is he bold?
>No one braver
>Is he sweet?
>Our favorite flavor

>Paul Gekko
>Paul Gekko
>Paul Gekko
>Paul Gekko
>Paul Gekko
>Paul Gekko

>Bless my soul
>Paul was on a roll
>He's in training
>Riding high
>And the nicest guy
>Not conceited

>He was a nothin'
>A zero, zero
>Now he's a honcho
>He's our hero
>He hit the heights at breakneck speed

>From zero to hero
>Paul is a hero
>Now he's a hero

>Wait and See!
1 post omitted.
Ineresting
>>22765 >>22766 Kiwifag cuckchanners need to get gassed, holy shit.
Yikes
>>22765 If you'e going to phonepost, learn how to crop

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Abdullah Kenerly Anonymous 01/20/2020 (Mon) 06:10:39 ID: 97657d No.28276 [Reply] [Last]
Abdullah Kenerly Abdullah (affectionately known as Monkey) is a G‚ÄčAMERGATE who spends his days flooding twitter and any forums he can find with hyper-autistic rants about the video game Kingdom Hearts 3. He can't seem to handle opinions other than his own, and is confirmed to be on the autism spectrum. This leads to him being frequently banned from websites like GameFAQs and others. His specialty is gaslighting, so he usually utilizes mutliple accounts on the same website to samefag his opinions. Twitter: @blessed2FM Youtube channel: AbdullahKProject wiiU username: AKenerly Address: 1613 MEADOW LANE TER, Fort Worth, TX, 76112 Phone: (817) 798 8719 Date of Birth: 11/21/1995 Age: 24 Known family members: Terrance L Kenerly and Aliyah Kenerly
70 posts and 60 images omitted.
>>28394 >i don't think X is funny <you must be X!
This thread was reported globally. I was confused when I saw a second thread for this until I checked the other one and saw the BO locked it for being >Not funny I'm locking this one as well. If they're reported globally again I'll just delete them unless the BO tells me otherwise.

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/vg/ autism & doxing extravaganza Anonymous 11/03/2019 (Sun) 21:38:49 No.16242 [Reply] [Last]
207 posts and 86 images omitted.
If I could harvest this autism and sell it on the black market, I'd be a rich man.
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>>28249 Might as well dump all of them right now. Cuckchanners never deliver. I wish that his mom didn't deliver on the day of his birth.
>>28249 keep posting smugs abdullah u r the gratest baddest mindbrokener around
Don't mind me, just here to julay all the lols from this G‚ÄčAMERGATE. Maybe I'll get a lel or two
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>>28044 The thread is over 2 months old with 200 replies. If >>27655 was you, then I basically agree with you: this thread is unfunny. Report the thread text time.

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Awful Deviantart/Furfag/fetish/autist art Anonymous 11/13/2019 (Wed) 04:39:22 ID: 3360b3 No.17833 [Reply]
Post what you got. The more fetishes and worse art the better

First two images are the legendary half-dude and the last two are https://www.deviantart.com/wolfcariocharlotte/gallery/
5 posts and 8 images omitted.
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:`)
>>18443
This thread is about awful DA stuff, not the greatest epic of our times
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I can't possibly write something to do these profiles justice https://www.deviantart.com/bluekoa64/art/EBP-Character-Bio-726245215 https://www.deviantart.com/gloriabomfim201 9/ https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCskwlrBZO3YO7dToqao89Yg/videos This profile has thousands of drawings of "wereroaches"

The eurasian tiger drama Anonymous 12/22/2019 (Sun) 16:08:33 ID: 9dfb1e No.24206 [Reply]
3 posts omitted.
>tfw you have a hapa son wtf am i gonna do bro's hes even trying to convince us to get him height pills bickers he doesnt wanna be short like mom
>>24569 >Send kid to Asia to live with distant Asian relatives and forget about him. >Find white girl donor egg and have your Asian wife do in vitro fertilization. >Have white child.
>>24571 harsh but.... his grandparents do love it when he visits
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>People on /cow/ are actually reproducing Mail order brides were a mistake.
>>24586 The Incel Revolution and its consequences have been a tragedy for the human race

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Half-life autistic Anonymous 12/06/2019 (Fri) 06:20:56 ID: 7a6997 No.21948 [Reply]
I figured /cow/ would find this interesting. Both bickers it's a lolcow and also bickers it involves this site. On 4chan's /v/ board there is a sperg that hates multiple games so much that he will literally make hundreds of threads and thousands of posts in only the spam of a few weeks just to shitpost it. Currently his autistic rage is on the videogame Half-Life. In the last 3 days alone he has made dozens of threads and hundreds of posts over 9 hours a day on 3 separate image boards just to let the world know how much Half-Life upsets him. He even goes to Julay's /v/ board, makes posts there then spams links to said posts on 4chan's /v/. If you make a thread about Half-life on 4chan, 8kun or Julay he will find it within minutes and spam it with the exact same posts. In my 12 years on image boards besides maybe Barneyfag I have never seen an anon so autistic before.
All 3 pics are of him.
2 posts omitted.
reminds me of goodrafucker from /vp/, can somebody insist that gordon freeman is the manliest character in all of gaming or something dumb like that? I bet that would trigger him pretty hard, it sure did trigger the slugfucker
>>22273
artifical lolcows arent good
>>22847
>>22043
Good to see another site death and exodus to a bunker didn't keep the "he's not EXACTLY THE SAME as chrischan so he's not a lolcow!!!!!" posters from shitting the place up.
>>23265
We need to make him realize that Emma Watson sucks so that he and Zach nuke each other online constantly for decades to come.
>>23265
>hurr durr a forced "lolcow" that is completely fabricated and isnt an actual schizo is totally a lolcow you guise
If the lolcow isnt real and all some act then whats the point? if its all an act then they arent a lolcow

>>23307
I could snap zach in half with my bear hands

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Anonymous 12/11/2019 (Wed) 17:24:13 ID: f8812a No.22842 [Reply]
i've been on and off on /cow/ for more than a year but i could never figure out what is "julay." am i retarded or something?
1 post omitted.
>>22842
>am i retarded or something?
Probably autistic as well.
sage
It's what ayys say when they find a jewel.
Jewel AYYYYY :^)
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Sad!

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