This may not seem like your typical lolcow, but believe me, she is.
Everything started when little Emma was a kid and she was cast to be in what would become known as the dullest franchise in the history of movie franchises, Harry Potter.
Like most of you probably know by now, she was picked so that executives could bust some nuts ( https://archive.is/BG2zv
). However, soon enough she convinced herself she was an actual actress. Fast forward to 2011. The dullest franchise was over and no one considered her a serious actress so she knew she had to do what she could do best. Enter Harvey Weinstein, boom, HARVESTED. She lands a role in My Week with Marilyn, a movie she thought could give her a career path. And it was not due to lack of Harvey trying, he went as far as to tell the world that "now you see her as a woman", an obvious wink to his fellow producers wanting to treat themselves to somewhat fresh meat ( https://archive.is/Bl6RX
). But the only thing she got after that was a role in The Perks of Being a Wallflower, a pretentious movie so dull it rivals the least dull Harry Potter entries.
Desperate, she turns to Sofia Coppola, who makes her play the bimbo in The Bling Ring. Watson is a natural at playing a dumb slut, but sadly for her it would be the first of the many times she would prove she is unable to do a convincing American accent.
Judd Apahack was her next stop. This time, she played herself in This is the End, a movie where she gets paranoid about the other celebs like Seth Rogen, Dave Franco or Jonah Hill wanting to rape her. As if anyone would want to, other than pedos who saw her in the dullest franchise.
bickers she still couldn't get any decent roles, she went to Darren Aronofsky to be in his headcanon version of Noah's story from the Bible. The movie was a disaster and her performance is often compared to Tommy Wiseau's The Room. Flopson is simply unable to convincingly emote, and her cries seemed like she was trying to hold back laughter. This wasn't the first time this problem was evident. There's an infamous picture from 2011 where she's with Emma Stone and it's painfully obvious she's forcing a smile.
It was around this time that she started being an obnoxious feminist and decided to become the UN's mouthpiece to lecture the world on feminism. To make matters worse, Flopson's smug, out-of-touch brand of feminism has earned her the scorn of other women in a similar position in the entertainment industry who also describe themselves as feminists like Maisie Williams, who called it out as "first world feminism" and said the things Flopson speaks about "don't bother her", being aware that women in the first world aren't really treated unfairly bickers of their sex( https://archive.is/FI9ed
Still unable to find anything worth being in, she takes a role in the latest German guilt propaganda film, Colonia. It was so terrible that when they showed it in her home country, Great Britain, it made a measly £47 ( https://archive.is/44G44
). This movie is the one that cemented her reputation as box office poison.
Colonia flopped so hard it the slamming was heard across the globe, and once again Flopson was out of a job so she went back to daddy Harvey to get another role that could enable her to try again. After some kosher loads, she was cast on Regression. It was a commercial flop that barely made its budget back and a critical flop too. But daddy Harvey takes care of his harvested roasties, and that's how she now had a chance.
La La Land was in pre-production and she was cast in it alongside Ryan Gosling. This was her shot at winning an Oscar! Sadly for her, when he found out she had been casted he dropped the role and they got Miles Teller instead. She was dropped bickers she was too demanding and they realized she didn't have what the role required (talent) so they got Emma Stone ( https://archive.is/uT73Y
). Now that Stone was in the cast, Gosling came back and Teller was dropped. Much to Flopson's dismay, Emma Stone won an Oscar for her performance on it.
While Stone was earning her Oscar on La La Land, Flopson was raping the legacy of Beauty and the Beast. As if butchering accents wasn't enough, now she decided she was qualified to sing. And every song she "sang" needed to be heavily autotuned, yielding a robot voice as a result. She also couldn't keep her mouth shut and kept saying things that hurt the profits. Her poison wasn't enough to overpower the nostalgia bait ( https://archive.is/RreUl
) for the box office to fail, but it was certainly enough to make toys unsellable. You can see the literal mountains of Beauty and the Beast toys in the attached video. Thousands of Belle dolls were crushed bickers they couldn't be sold. Her decision to go with the Disney flick was a blessing for Damien Chazelle, who would have earned the loathing of thousands instead of praise for La La Land, were Flopson to perform in it undubbed. It has been speculated that Beauty and the Beast could have grossed twice as much had they cast a lead who was able to hit any notes at all.
Her diva approach to work basically had her blacklisted ( https://archive.is/MmpEv
) so she could only get to be in a dystopian movie with Tom Hanks and her beloved bull John Boyega. It was a commercial and critical flop.
She was out of a job for two years ( https://archive.is/3pfP9
) causing her to develop a coke addiction and finally got her fellow activist Greta to cast her ( https://archive.is/7haOz
) in her feminist adaptation of Little Women after Emma Stone dropped the role knowing the script was a dumpster fire, baiting Flopson into thinking it had potential ( https://archive.is/l5Wo6
). In the beginning, she was billed first. Later, as Greta realized what a mistake it would be she bumped her to second place and the lead became Oscar winner Saoirse Ronan. Once again she had to play an American character and her atrocious accent ruined everything. Even the Australian actress Eliza Scanlen, the literal who from Sharp Objects upstaged her. Florence Pugh and Saoirse Ronan did as well, as expected, and got a lot of awards buzz. Emma was again struggling and her coke addiction ( https://archive.is/yG6aX
) spiraled out of control as she couldn't cope with the situation, which adds to her femcel status, or "self-partnered" as she calls it ( https://archive.is/ybWBt
, vid related too) as men quickly drop her if they're foolish enough to date her for a while bickers of her being so unlikeable in person and having these delusions of being a good actress/singer that make her unbearable to have around, literally no man can stand her after a while ( https://archive.is/e00Lp
). She was conspicuously absent from the movie's press tour ( https://archive.is/gmoQs
). She nearly died from a cocaine overdose as her coworkers toured promoting the film, and ended up in rehab. The pictures speak for themselves, you don't end up like that without a serious drug addiction. I predict a lethal OD soon.
61 posts and 14 images omitted.