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Star Wars IX Stormtrooper 12/13/2019 (Fri) 20:05:11 No.679
So it looks like the plot for IX was leaked on multiple sites and a lot of it was confirmed in recent trailers and a Burger King ad. There's currently a meltdown going on at Plebbit. There's a whole lot of negative reactions and social media insanity going on because of IX. I also just found out that even if the movie doesn't flop, Disney won't be able to recover their losses from this quarter which are currently near the bottom line. Discuss? How fucked is Disney's abomination?
So where's the script?
>>679
>I also just found out that even if the movie doesn't flop, Disney won't be able to recover their losses from this quarter which are currently near the bottom line.
Proof?
>>680
Hopefully in the trash where it belongs.
>>684
The leaks talked about a planet named Exogol as Palpatine's secret base and that it was protected by a giant floating cube and that he had numerous Palpatine clones. The newest trailer confirmed all of that. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SIfYLFF4gp0
Reminder that this crap pile releases in 2 days.
>>686
>2 days
>the entire movie is still not leaked
i am a bit let down, then again, motivation for doing that is non-existant
>>685
so, why the fuck that ugly emo is battling palpatine that was dead for decades?
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>>687
Footage hasn't been leaked, but the plot and ending already have. Movie ends with Rey going to Tatooine where Luke's old home is now just a crater. There she buries Luke and Leia's lightsabers with Han's dice and Chewbacca's belt (all dead) then some old man who looks like Obi Wan goes up to her and asks who she is as he hasn't seen anyone there for a long time. Rey then says
>I'm Rey... Rey Skywalker.
And that's how it fucking ends.

Pic-related is the location of the final shot of the film.
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>>679
They are giving representation to lesbians, and that's beautiful.
PALPATINE KILLS KYLO.
REY IS PALPATINE'S GRANDDAUGHTER.
REY TOGETHER WITH LUKE AND LEIA'S FORCE GHOSTS KILL PALPATINE.
>>679
>How fucked is Disney's abomination?
Utterly, even normalfags are jumping ship. The new film was brought up at work and reactions were negative to it. Complaints were less to do with lore (seen as they are casuals) but they were disappointed with the overuse of shitty special effects, general decline in quality (hell one normalfag even said the PT was better), and killing off the main characters. Even the Disney shill of the group admitted the best movie so far has been Rogue One, though they are still looking forward to the new film
>>691
I wish I had your optimism. When it came up at a work lunch last week everyone was excited for it and talking about how they couldn't wait to see it in theaters. They were also going on about how Disney+ was worth it, and that they were experimenting with American VPNs to sign up for even more streaming services that we can't get in our country, like Hulu.
Normalfags are just desperate to give megacorps as much money as they can.
>>690
>REY TOGETHER WITH LUKE AND LEIA'S FORCE GHOSTS KILL PALPATINE.
Worse. Rey fuses with all the force ghosts of all the jedis in history, hence the line "a thousand generations live within you now". She eats the souls of millions or even billions and becomes like Korra from Avatar
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>>679
>Disney won't be able to recover their losses
Oh god pls yes
>>686
Thank god the wait is finally over. I for one am eager for it to be released. Granted I'm not going to spend a cent on it, won't ever watch it and am only excited to laugh at just how badly they fuck this up. But hey at least someone is excited for it right?
>>693
Jesus, I feel for ya anon.
I hope you niggers are doing your part of spoiling the film for everyone else. Remember this shit premiers in LA tomorrow then hits theaters worldwide on the 18th and 20th.
Sadly I'm still gonna go see it in the cinema juts purely out of self hate
>>700
Nigger why? Are you that much of a slave to peer pressure? This movie's performance could decide the fate of Lucasfilm.
>>701
this. they can play off TLJ drop-off, the Soylo flop, and everything else. but if a major numbered release flops, there is no way to damage control. it could lead to a complete tailspin, which would be glorious to watch.
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>>705
They will lie about BO numbers, expect reports of empty theaters while it "breaks records" I suspect this to be the reason for the gloomy outlook even from some of the shill media before release. I believe this is might be a tactic on their end since the movie is clearly trash they admit it before hand & have their employees admit it or say something out of touch (Kathleen) before release & then they manipulate the BO & run around saying how the opposition to the movie was only a small minority & how nobody actually wants good movies anymore & to expect more trash in the future.
Also I'm not sure what normalfags will do after all they don't have to work/go to school generally speaking for about a week & that's too long for them not to consume hyped media.In any case I don't believe this movie will be liked, its possible the normalfags might "like it" at release but like TFA as soon as the hype dies down in January to February even they will realize it sucked.
>>699
I gave my normie sisters a run through of the plot and they both said it sounds terrible. As soon as I pointed out that Rey was a Mary-Sue(and explained what one is) they both realised the twat had never seen any adversity that she couldn't just step over.
>>694

No...

NO...

UNLIMITED POWAHHHHHHHHHHHH
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MOVIE LEAK! Palpatine eats souls! Rey kills Palpatine with a dual lightsaber electric beam! Rey calls herself Rey Skywalker now!
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>>716
>rey kills palpatine
So rey finally completes her mission to destroy what remained of the original characters?
So in regards to the rest of the sequel trilogy, I've forgotten a lot of things about it because it's been a while. I'm more of a /strek/ kind of guy, but I enjoy Star Wars. I remember not wanting to ever watch TLJ ever again because of how tremendously boring it was, but this review linked below piqued my interest because I realized I was so zoned out during my viewing that I didn't even bother processing any of the story going on with Luke and the Jedi Order, philosophical subtext and how it relates to the rest of the saga. That being said, I do think the film is bogus still. It was spinning its wheels for over 90% with what was essentially a competition of incompetence between the Resistance and First Order until Holdo, a character that really had no reason to exist as they already had Ackbar who they needlessly killed in minutes, did her thing; a maneuver that was so scientifically grounded that it invalidated all of the lore development and even the name Star Wars.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T2cBTLsWiDg

Unrelated to the review, does Rey have anything to gain from this? With Luke, I recall his initial objective being to save a beautiful princess and avenge his father and then Obi-wan and those motivations are transformed in Episode V. With Rey's parents being irrelevant, there really isn't any reason for her to still be involved. Unless this was already addressed in VII or VIII, she was just swept along by pure chance, which doesn't sit well as this is supposed to be a saga. Also, if she is irrelevant, I don't understand how she was able to best a Skywalker at the force in Episode VII if she's just some random girl. It's probably more of a motif that's just supposed to be accepted rather than thought of in such literal terms, but this isn't an excuse. A director can make an Episode his own, but the narrative should work within the established constraints
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I fucking hate Disney
>>688
>Leia's lightsaber
Come again? pic unrelated
There's a leak from 4chan. It's too stupid to be real in my opinion, but it's a hilarious read:

The climax of the movie has been altered yet again. Everything here is based on the newest cut right now:
>Rey arrives on Exogol to confront Sheev. Sheev is attached to his life support chair.
>Sheev talks to Rey, nearly reciting word-for-word his speech to Luke from ROTJ.
>Sheev confirms that Rey is his granddaughter, but doesn't go into detail about which one of her parents was his offspring.
>Rey asks Sheev how he's still alive if Vader killed him 31 years ago. This is an alteration from the "Kylo meeting Sheev" scene.
>PLOT TWIST: Sheev reveals that he's the REAL one. The Sheev who died in ROTJ was merely a clone. Sheev knew that Vader would ultimately betray him, so he prepared several clones in advance for such an occasion while he hid himself on Exogol, tricking the galaxy into thinking he was dead. The Knights of Ren are also implied to be clones. During this revelation, another clone walks in, appearing to be far younger than the current Sheev. This clone is played by Matt Smith.
As a side note, this is easily the worst part of the entire movie based on this current cut, as it implies that Palpatine willingly allowed his empire to fall, it directly negates Vader's sacrifice, and made everyone post-ROTJ look like massive idiots who got bamboozled. Anyway...
>Kylo Ren approaches the throne room, but the Knights of Ren stop him. Rey "force teleports" Leia's lightsaber to him. Kylo kills all the Knights and enters the throne room.
>Sheev smiles and states how Rey and Kylo have finally been brought together, almost mirroring Snoke's speech in TLJ. This is one of the things that JJ meant of "honoring" TLJ.
>Sheev says "Execute Order 67" through a hologram. The Sith Armada of Star Destroyers mounted with Death Star cannons arises from the water.
>Leia and Hux join forces & assemble the Resistance Fleet. They engage with the Sith forces over Exogol.
>Jannah and Finn lead a cavalry aboard General Pryde's flagship to disable it as regular ships can't destroy for some reason. They must take out the flag ship in order to send the Sith Fleet into a disarray. Finn and Jannah kill Pryde and take out the flagship.
>Sheev cackles and shoots out force lightning to disable the entire Resistance Fleet. The Millennium Falcon gets blown up. Leia, Lando, Chewie, 3PO, and R2 die. This is supposed to be the "saddest" part of the movie.
>Rey and Kylo try to fight off Sheev. Sheev kills Kylo with force lightning and sends him into the abyss. This causes Rey to get angry and channel every Jedi ever. Sheev shoots lightning at Rey, but she deflects it back at him. Sheev blows up, dying once and for all.
>Rey then shoots a torrent of lightning into the sky and disables the rest of the Sith Armada. The remaining Resistance ships finish them off. Victory ensues, and everyone cheers for Rey.
>The ending involving Tatooine and "Rey Skywalker" is the same. They go to Tatooine to bury the Skywalker family's stuff, and a stranger walks up to Rey and asks her who she is. She takes on the surname "Skywalker" as a title, for she has "found her place in life" and whatnot. The End.
And there you have it. Additionally, this movie will get an early premiere in Japan one week before it releases everywhere else, so expect early spoilers.
>>724
I agree it's too hilariously bad to be true, but we'll know for sure soon.
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>>724
So they're expecting the Samurai to absolutely love it and pad critic scores because they have shit taste. What they are not accounting for is that the Japs have shit taste in all the right ways.
>>724
>31 years ago
In other words it took one fucking year for Ray to go from some desert dweller who doesn't even think The Force is real and having never seen a lightsaber let alone touch one to being able to single handedly defeat one of the most power Sith ever. But remember guys she's NOT a mary sue.

>>725
>it's too hilariously bad to be true
Not for nuStar Wars it isn't.
>>724
>It's too stupid to be real
It’s just stupid enough
>>719
>last pic
I knew that leak was real, and I knew how much I'd hate it for figuratively sithspitting on Bastila Shan/KOTOR.
>>724
>>Sheev says "Execute Order 67" through a hologram
No way. The rest I can all believe but even for Disney that seems like too much.
>>733
Maybe it's just adlibbing, but who knows? This leak is from about a month ago and therefore might be based on a different cut, but it mostly lines up with current information from the premiere like the Rey Skywalker stuff. Rey "channeling every Jedi" also makes a frightening amount of sense as Hayden Christensen and Ashley Eckstein (Ashoka Tano's VA) have confirmed voice cameos and also showed up at the premiere.
Some leaks from plebbit:

- Some more confirmation that, yes, Kylo dies after his redemption. Kylo revives Rey. They smile at each other, she says "Ben" and they kiss. Kylo disappears like Luke when he dies. They do not say "I love you."

- Rey is the granddaughter of Grandpapa Palps. Takes the name Rey Skywalker at the end (whole Tatooine scene is true). Rey having BB8 at the end isn't explained. Finn & Poe are alive, but they are not with her in the final scene.

- Leia and Kylo have no scenes together. Rey stabs Kylo during their fight at the same moment Leia dies. Rey cries and heals him after.

- Han is in the movie. Anakin's voice IS in the movie. Hayden voiced Anakin.

- "You can't hide, Rey. Not from me." -line from Kylo.

- "Kylo holds her sweetly when he brings her back to life," and says the force bond is stronger than ever.

- Jannah isn't confirmed to be Lando's daughter. Poe lives. Knights of Ren are hardly in the movie (I'm assuming they only appear in the helmet repair scene and when Rey & Kylo fight them). Doesn't remember KoR having any dialogue.

- " No they don't really fight [Palpatine]. Yes he shoots lightning into the sky"

- Nobody ends up with anyone in a romantic sense at the end of the movie.

- Movie doesn't explain how Palpatine is back. Palpatine created Snoke and there are a couple tanks with Snoke clones in them. Nothing else is explained.

- Kylo's reaction to seeing Rey dead: "Panicked and hurt. It was well acted but still so awkward because of pacing.

- After the redemption, Ben doesn't have any lines. Apparently his character overally doesn't have as many lines in this movie. (Lots of people talking about this part: I doubt he has way less dialogue because he's one of the main characters and has a ton of scenes with Rey.)

- About Reylo moments: " There were honestly moments that could have been so hot if they'd been handled better. They way they talked to each other was kinda 'wink wink' and the force bond was really strong so that was cool"

- Only the force ghosts of Luke & Leia are at the end.

- Leia's last word is "Ben"

- "First [Palpatine] wants Rey to kill him, then when she doesn't, Rey just reflects his lightning back at him until he dies. They don't fight Palps. Ben gets yeeted into the Pit"

- Answering what Palpatine does in the movie (kinda vague): "He does nothing but talk shit to Kylo who doesnt listen to him anyway. But Ian's performance was still great."

- "Luke's ghost appeared to catch Rey's saber when she tried to throw it away."

- Hux is RIP. He was revealed as a spy because he basically wanted to tear Kylo down. He helps Finn & Poe escape. Gets killed by Pryde.

- Rey fought Dark Rey, which was a vision, for a little bit then the vision disappeared. This sequence is on the wreckage of the Death Star.

- "The opening scene is actually the Kylo on the red planet scene and it has little added context! He is there to get a way finder to Sith Land, and immediately arrives there and it goes right into the scenes from the Kylo tv spot. That's literally the opening of the movie."

- Rose and Rey didn't speak to each other.

- About the LGBT moment in the movie: " That woman that is close to Leia and Holdo? She kisses a woman in the background at the end." (It's Commander D'Acy)

- Ben says to Rey: "You wanted to take my hand." And Rey responds to the comment later in another scene by saying, "I did want to take your hand. Ben's hand."

- Says it's implied that Finn is going to confess his feelings for Rey (their interpretation), but it doesn't happen. Rey confides in Finn and prefers him over Poe because she doesn't get along with him.

- Han appears to Kylo and they have a very similar conversation as the TFA bridge moment (even some exact dialogue). Ben says "You're just a memory." Han says "Your memory," touches his face. And Ben turns and tosses away his red saber. "Leia used her last strength to reach out to Ben and call his name. He felt it and saw Han afterward. These two interactions cause his turn."

(con
>>735
- Why Finn screams "Rey!" in the trailers: " He was just worried about Rey fighting Kylo. He actually falls because Rey force pushes him back, presumably to keep him away from the fight."

- "Ben destroys Reys wayfinder and it pisses her off. He doesn't fight her back too much. Whenever she stops swinging, he stops." There's a moment when they fight where Kylo knocks Rey down and the reason she's able to get the upper hand and stab him is because Leia calls to him through the force and dies. Kylo destroys the wayfinder because "He wants her to use his with him. He says "The only way you are getting there is with me" and crushes hers"

- List of deaths they remember: Boolio, Hux, Pryde, Leia, Ben, Snap Wexley, Rey (temporarily), Palpatine

- Some more confirmation that, yes, Kylo dies after his redemption. Kylo revives Rey. They smile at each other, she says "Ben" and they kiss. Kylo disappears like Luke when he dies. They do not say "I love you."

- Rey is the granddaughter of Grandpapa Palps. Takes the name Rey Skywalker at the end (whole Tatooine scene is true). Rey having BB8 at the end isn't explained. Finn & Poe are alive, but they are not with her in the final scene.

- Leia and Kylo have no scenes together. Rey stabs Kylo during their fight at the same moment Leia dies. Rey cries and heals him after.

- Han is in the movie. Anakin's voice IS in the movie. Hayden voiced Anakin.

- "You can't hide, Rey. Not from me." -line from Kylo.

- "Kylo holds her sweetly when he brings her back to life," and says the force bond is stronger than ever.

- Jannah isn't confirmed to be Lando's daughter. Poe lives. Knights of Ren are hardly in the movie (I'm assuming they only appear in the helmet repair scene and when Rey & Kylo fight them). Doesn't remember KoR having any dialogue.

- " No they don't really fight [Palpatine]. Yes he shoots lightning into the sky"

- Nobody ends up with anyone in a romantic sense at the end of the movie.

- Movie doesn't explain how Palpatine is back. Palpatine created Snoke and there are a couple tanks with Snoke clones in them. Nothing else is explained.

- Kylo's reaction to seeing Rey dead: "Panicked and hurt. It was well acted but still so awkward because of pacing.

- After the redemption, Ben doesn't have any lines. Apparently his character overally doesn't have as many lines in this movie. (Lots of people talking about this part: I doubt he has way less dialogue because he's one of the main characters and has a ton of scenes with Rey.)

- About Reylo moments: " There were honestly moments that could have been so hot if they'd been handled better. They way they talked to each other was kinda 'wink wink' and the force bond was really strong so that was cool"

- Only the force ghosts of Luke & Leia are at the end.

- Leia's last word is "Ben"

- "First [Palpatine] wants Rey to kill him, then when she doesn't, Rey just reflects his lightning back at him until he dies. They don't fight Palps. Ben gets yeeted into the Pit"

- Answering what Palpatine does in the movie (kinda vague): "He does nothing but talk shit to Kylo who doesnt listen to him anyway. But Ian's performance was still great."

- "Luke's ghost appeared to catch Rey's saber when she tried to throw it away."

- Hux is RIP. He was revealed as a spy because he basically wanted to tear Kylo down. He helps Finn & Poe escape. Gets killed by Pryde.

- Rey fought Dark Rey, which was a vision, for a little bit then the vision disappeared. This sequence is on the wreckage of the Death Star.

- "The opening scene is actually the Kylo on the red planet scene and it has little added context! He is there to get a way finder to Sith Land, and immediately arrives there and it goes right into the scenes from the Kylo tv spot. That's literally the opening of the movie."

- Rose and Rey didn't speak to each other.

- About the LGBT moment in the movie: " That woman that is close to Leia and Holdo? She kisses a woman in the background at the end." (It's Commander D'Acy)

(cont.)
>>736
- Ben says to Rey: "You wanted to take my hand." And Rey responds to the comment later in another scene by saying, "I did want to take your hand. Ben's hand."

- Says it's implied that Finn is going to confess his feelings for Rey (their interpretation), but it doesn't happen. Rey confides in Finn and prefers him over Poe because she doesn't get along with him.

- Han appears to Kylo and they have a very similar conversation as the TFA bridge moment (even some exact dialogue). Ben says "You're just a memory." Han says "Your memory," touches his face. And Ben turns and tosses away his red saber. "Leia used her last strength to reach out to Ben and call his name. He felt it and saw Han afterward. These two interactions cause his turn."

- Why Finn screams "Rey!" in the trailers: " He was just worried about Rey fighting Kylo. He actually falls because Rey force pushes him back, presumably to keep him away from the fight."

- "Ben destroys Reys wayfinder and it pisses her off. He doesn't fight her back too much. Whenever she stops swinging, he stops." There's a moment when they fight where Kylo knocks Rey down and the reason she's able to get the upper hand and stab him is because Leia calls to him through the force and dies. Kylo destroys the wayfinder because "He wants her to use his with him. He says "The only way you are getting there is with me" and crushes hers"

- List of deaths they remember: Boolio, Hux, Pryde, Leia, Ben, Snap Wexley, Rey (temporarily), Palpatine

- "Ben comes to save her from becoming Empress Palpatine (I'm serious) and revives her when killing Palps kills her. Ben never wanted her dead. She instantly regrets stabbing him."

- Palpatine is waiting for Rey to come kill him so all the Sith can inhabit her body. Then he gets rejuvenated by Ben and Rey's combined energies/powers/something like that, and decides to kill them

- There is a flashback scene of Luke training Leia in the Force and lightsaber combat. She even had a saber which Force Ghost Luke gives to Rey. Leia has been training Rey in the Force. Rey can straight up float while also levitating tons of rocks around her.

- KoR gang up on Kylo and are beating him when Rey initiates a force bond and gives him a lightsaber through the bond.

- Lando flies the falcon and bring a bunch of ships to the big fight at the end.

- Kylo and Chewie also have no scenes together.

- "Rey stole Ben's ship on the death star and takes it to Ach-to to hide out there forever like Luke, so she destroys it so she cant leave." "Then she goes to throw her saber into the flames but ghost Luke catches it and then gives her Leia's saber and then lifts the x-wing out of the water. That's how Rey gets off Ach-to"

- During the Pasaana scene after Rey destroys Kylo's first ship: "Ben walks up to Rey to push her into using the dark side to prove she's a Palpatine."

- Palpatine tells Kylo to kill Rey and Kylo basically refuses (he doesn't outright say it though). Kylo is done taking orders.

- In the scene where the voices of the Jedi come to aid Rey, they tell her to rise and that she has all of the power of the Jedi. Anakin's voice is there, so is Ahsoka's. A lot of the dialogue overlaps. Yoda's voice is there. Confirmed Obi-Wan's voice is too. Thinks Mace Windu's voice is in it.

- Force dyad is in the movie. Ben & Rey have a very deep connection.

- How Rey's resurrection and Rey/Kylo kiss happens: "Ben climbs out of the pit, sees fallen Rey from a distance and rushes over as best he can, limping. He gets to her and pulls her into his lap and holds her to his chest, heartbroken. Then he calms himself, leans her back, lays hands, and revives her. When she comes back, she holds his hand, looks into his eyes, smiles huge, calls him Ben, and they have a solid full contact kiss for about 2 seconds? He smiles back. Then he abruptly falls over dead, she touches him, and he vanishes." So he died happy.

(cont.)
>>737
- C3PO gets his memory back. He can understand Sith script but is forbidden from translating it so they hack his memory, thus wiping it, and he tells them where to find the wayfinder. Forgets everyone/everything but is restored by R2.

- There is a moment where Chewie mourns Leia :(

- Implied Finn is force-sensitive.

- Carrie & Billie share a scene together where they talk about Resistance-related stuff.

- Planet that gets hit by the red beam in the trailers is Kimiji (no clue how to spell it lmao)

- Kylo rips off Rey's beaded necklace during a force bond and that's how he locates her on Pasaana

- Scene where Kylo looks at Vader's mask from the D23 footage: "He touches the mask and focuses, and thru that fucks with Rey's training. She gets clumsier and then gets mad and that's why she's so pissed when she cuts the tree. She can feel him messing with her."

- Rey's parents DID sell her off on Jakku because they believed it would protect her. Papa Palps tracked them down and killed them.

- Getting the trio to the Death Star: Rey goes with Finn and Poe to the planet. They meet Jannah who says to wait until the water is calmer, but Rey sneaks off by herself. Kylo gets there on another tie fighter.

- When Rey stabs Kylo: "He doesnt say anything. Rey then silently cries and heals him which I think ended up healing his scar because it's gone later. That's when she says about wanting to take Ben's hand and runs off and steals his ship leaving him on the DS"

- When Rey jumps out of the hangar: Kylo told her about the dyad, and that Palpatine didn't know. He offered his hand again and said you know what you have to do. She says, "I do." And jumps

- When Kylo tells Rey her parentage: Rey says "You're lying" and Kylo replies "I've never lied to you." She believes him.

- Rey's parents are seen in the movie (flashback) and have dialogue.

- Kylo & Leia "pass on" together, they disappear (like Luke) at the same time. I guess Leia's spirit was waiting for Ben.

- Palpatine refers to Kylo as a Skywalker when he yeets him down the pit. (Rise of Skywalker = coming out of the pit?)

- First Order meeting scene: "Ben walks in the room wearing his mask, talks a bit, then he sense Hux is uncomfortable about the mask and calls him out for it. Hux denies it a bit comically. Someone else says "I like it""

- Rey studies the Jedi texts in order to figure out what to do about Palpatine.

- " Hux telling Finn to shoot him in the arm to convince Pryde and Kylo that he'd been ambushed, only for Finn to shoot him in the leg" and later Pryde shoots him in the chest, killing him.

- Kylo: "I killed Snoke. I'll kill you, too." Palpatine: "I created Snoke."

- Rey and Poe arguing: "Poe was mad that BB8 was banged up and Rey was mad the Falcon was banged up. And Rey had this funny sarcastic smile and said "You know what you are? You're difficult. You're a difficult man.""

- Some more Kylo/Rey dialogue through the force bond. Kylo: "Wherever you are, you're hard to find." Rey: "You're hard to get rid of"

- Luke & Leia training scene: "It was a flashback. Luke was wearing a mask and Leia was mostly a silhouette. They were fighting with lightsabers and I think Leia knocked Luke on his ass, then it showed his young cgi face and then her young cgi face. They have no lines because there is a Luke voiceover"



And that's that, sorry the formatting is shit. Blame reddit for that.
>>738
I am ready to watch this crash and burn. It’s gonna be great.
>>735
>Movie doesn't explain how Palpatine is back. Palpatine created Snoke and there are a couple tanks with Snoke clones in them. Nothing else is explained.
JUST
>>740
When you put it like that this sounds like a bad ripoff of the dark empire books
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>>736
>Movie doesn't explain how Palpatine is back. Palpatine created Snoke and there are a couple tanks with Snoke clones in them. Nothing else is explained.
I remember they had one of those DK books that claimed snoke wore custom made gold slippers because he was in constant pain. Why would the Emperor make such defective clones? Also who or what is snoke? What purpose did he serve? He must have been important enough for Palpatine to have cloned him multiple times.
Is he a failed Emperor clone? A clone of someone else ( I thought he was an alien)? Why make snoke at all?
I still hope there is time travel involved however clones are just as bad in b4 cloned Darth Vader spin off right before a full OT reboot.
>>724
>Execute Order 67
great, now we will need to wait for the next 6 movies for the order 69
>>742
>Also who or what is snoke? What purpose did he serve? Why make snoke at all?
All of these will be answered in the other two movies in the trilogy, right?
>>742
Stop thinking, just consume.
>>744
I'm sure they'll make some lgbbq fart fetish book that will come up with something.
>>742
>Also who or what is snoke? What purpose did he serve?
An attempt to reboot Palpatine. What they're doing with him now it a desperate attempt to explain him now that Retard Johnson "subverted" expectations by killing him off early.
After the Soylo watch-along thread, I promised i'd do webms for Episode 9. I have surgery tomorrow and might not be well enough to do it for this one. We'll see if I can do it, just an FYI that somebody else might have to do the honor.
According to most recent leaks. Sheev addresses Rey as “Empress Palpatine.”
>>749
>I have surgery tomorrow and might not be well enough to do it for this one
Don't worry about it. No one that isn't being paid by disney actually wants to watch it.
>>724
I was never really into the EU but Sheev having infinite clones to keep being a villain with always sounded boring or bad. Was it that way in the EU?
>>758
Not really. He was so advanced in the Dark Side that his bodies couldn't keep up with him.
ROTTEN TOMATOES CRITICS REVIEWS ARE COMING IN
60% OF 95 REVIEWERS LIKED IT
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>Box-office figures don’t enlighten. Thanks to inflation, they’re no longer an index of popularity. Aggregate website figures are only a consensus of the cultural fringe meeting the media elite.

Episode IX was going to be underwhelming no matter what. The sequel trilogy shot itself in the foot with the release of The Force Awakens which tried too hard to ape the original Star Wars, eradicating the Star Wars myth in the process. Rian Johnson had some interesting ideas but with Mr. Abrams at the helm for the end to the Skywalker saga it's bound to be riddled with juvenile fan service. They're going to waste too much time bouncing back and forth between the remaining original trilogy characters while giving screen time to develop what's there of the sequel trilogy characters and it won't be satisfying.
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>>749
Here's a partial set of leaks.
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Does anyone have interest in going to see it in theaters? I was planning on just watching it in a few months when things die down, but I might see it on release after all.

>>762
>first clip
Finn confirmed as being Force-sensitive.
>>761
I bet it's those alt-right nazi russian troll that took over (((reputable))) critic outlet
People are saying, "the reviews are so bad it's making me think the movie is good, since critics often get it wrong!" Critics in their negative reviews are saying, "Star Wars fans will enjoy it." It's pretty obvious what they are doing here - rather than lying to the goyim outright, they're pretending they think the movie is bad to get them to go see it.

Don't be deceived.
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Hello, someone posted a link to this website on r/starwars.

I think what you are doing is hate speech and very disrespectful and anti-semitic of J. J. Abrahms.

Episode IX is already a tremendous success, and the Force is Female.
>>767
>I am all the sith!!!
>And I am all the jedi!!!
>>768
Lovely, Rey and Palpatine are LGBT representation

They incarnate all the genders within themselves
>>768
Positively TLJ-tier
>>764
>Is anyone else planning on giving money to Disney
No.
>>766
nah that is just trying to save face
>>768
what did they mean by this?
>>769
>They incarnate all the genders within themselves
omg wtf bigot there is mpre then two genders
>>770
so it is K I N O ?
>>768
You know, I remember the first time I saw the ending of RoTJ. I thought the final battle where Vader just picks up the Emperor and throws him down a hole was kinda boring compared with the bombing run on the Death Star and Luke's first real lightsaber fight, but I understood the emotional weight behind a father sacrificing himself to save his son and all that shit. But what emotional weight is behind Mary Sue here? To defeat the ebil huwite straight male patriarchy? And this movie has no where near the technical limitations the OT had so there's no reason for it to be this visually boring.
>>776
There is no emotional weight at all. The yidsney trilogy has been devoid of emotional weight the entire run. What a disaster.
>>777
Trips of truth, but I'll ad that yidsney is devoid of emotional weight, and life in it's entirety.
>>766
>(((disney))) is so desperate to get the fans back they're actually having their paid shills shit on the movie hoping to reverse physiology people
This would be sad if it wasn't so funny.
>>776
Well, the Emperor did kill her parents, but that hasn't been revealed yet. I think a lot of the issues are because they tried to do something different, where the characters aren't explicitly good or bad, but confused. That confusion comes from a bunch of off-screen events and probably the Force, which is something that no one understands, so we're not left with anything but a misanthropic pseudo-couple that we can only theorize as to why they're drawn together.

Finn, the side character, is the most developed because it's clear why he leaves the First Order and, just like anyone with no skin in the game, tries to abandon the Resistance at the beginning of the movie. I forget why he helps the Resistance, so it probably wasn't a very good reason, but they had a good opportunity to complete his arc and, as Rian would say, subvert everyone's expectations by letting him sacrifice himself, but it would've been redundant as they already did that with the infinitely worse character that is Holdo in a way that ruins everything about Star Wars. As to why he continues to help Rey is also something I can't remember, which means it's probably also not a very good reason. Now that it's implied that he's Force-sensitive, though, it's probably this subconscious desire to help balance the Force. Or it could be because he wants to fuck her, and why he would want to do that would be the greatest mystery of them all.
>>783
wait but if bitch is palpatines blood, wouldnt that mean that sheev would have to kill himself?
>>784
What do you mean? Why would he have to die? In any case, it's not like death means anything to Sheev.
>>768
So all you need to stop Sheev is two lightsabers since he's apparently too dumb to stop using lightning?
>>785
well, if rey is palpatine and sheev kills her parents, that should mean that he kills one of these
>himself, as her father
>his son (>implying he had one)
>one of his clones
right?
>>787
No, I think Sheev wants Rey to rule with him, or at least that's what I gathered from the leaks.
>>783
>who are mary sue's parents so mysterious isn't this such a intriguing mystery goyim make sure to pay to see the next movie too
>oh your parents where nobody and sold you for drinking money haha expectations subverted you evil white males
>no wait one of them is actually sidious' kid because we need a reason to bring back a fan favorite so those evil white man babies will pay to see this
>but he killed them because uuuuuuum MYSTERY BOX!
This is what happens when you have multiple writers working on a single fan fiction.
>>775
>They incarnate all the genders within themselves
>omg wtf bigot there is mpre then two genders
Exactly, Rey in that moment is representing the entire spectrum of gender. Jedi were thousands if not million of people, so that basically cover the entire rainbow flag. She is the rainbow messiah.
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>Ahsoka really is dead
F
>>788
>No, I think Sheev wants Rey to rule with him
but why?
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Filename.

>>792
BECAUSE WE NEEDED A THIRD TRILOGY GODDAMNIT
>>791
>"I am all the Jedi"
>they're all from the past two generations
They had Jennifer Hale in there already. Would it really have killed them to have her be Bastila Shan instead?
>>793
"My seed was still strong" is such a hilariously bad line. Poor Ian.
>>793
>sheev froze his sperm when he was still a chad
Rey comes literally from the prequels. It's over guys, Disney actually made better prequels than Lucas, confirmed.
>>794
Nobody who went to see the movie would know who bastila, kyle katarn, mara jade, or any of the other jedi/sith outside of the first 3 movies was.
>>791
she shouldnt exist in the first place, even though girls with weird skin colors are my fetish she was nothing more then a useless filler that was breaking cannonicity of clone wars. original tartakovsky series had multiple characters that were homages to the work done with eu by different authors, in a way, it was a giant colab with great action scenes and pacing
and all that gone so that some furfag can jack off his meat to some tight orange teenage butt
>>796
>implying sheev was ever not a chad
>implying he couldn't impregnate women with the force alone
I mean if anakin could be born by the force it stands to reason a very powerful sith or jedi could do the same.
>>797
And they'd know who Luminara Unduli is?
Honestly I doubt half the people going to this could name the movie's own main characters either.
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So far the reception on reddit is really good! Unlike you, real Star Wars fans were pretty excited at getting Sheev back. And all the plot points were covered.

1. We now know who Rey's parents are. Kylo didn't because he was tricked.
2. Rey's powers are inherited, she's not a Mary Sue.
3. Luke has been degraded at all: first of all, flashbacks confirmed he was weak compared to Leia. Secondly, his real role was just to help Rey in her final attack and that's enough.
4. Leia didn't fly in space like Superman. She was just that good with the force, deal with that sexists!
>>799
wait wasnt that literally anakins hidden backstory? an experiment by darth plaguis the wise in creating artificial life?
>>806
So he said, in reality he was inseminating women at random with telekinesis sperm.
>>805
>2. Rey's powers are inherited, she's not a Mary Sue.
You gave yourself away.
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Half of expected reviews are in. Wow.
>>805
I know you're being sarcastic, but I feel like that stupid shit is exactly the retardation some reddit cuck would say.
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>>814
>Tumblr nose
Looks about right.
>>814
>an impossible miracle of cinema
lol
>>814
I honestly can't tell if this is suppose to be parody or not.
>>817
Actually yes, the author went full cuck during the SJW cultural revolution
>>814
stuff like this is the reason why I stopped reading PvP.
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>>814
>If you don't mindlessly consume you are not allowed to enjoy ANYTHING
Your logic on soy, so smug, so confident. Such a long way to fall.
>>768
This is the climax? Seriously? I expected something bad, but this is just... sad, it’s cringey, it’s something I would expect children playing pretend to come up with. This is bad.
>>822
It's the ROJ finale, only remade into a feminist power fantasy. Or a Korra episode, your call
>>822
>implying children playing pretend would be that bad
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>>820
>>768
>>763
>>762
This garbage is seriously the best they could come up with? Holy fuck. Only thing worse is the tie-in comic where we find out Snoke and Kylo Ren were pederast lovers.
>>825
And yeah, Snoke's a tranny.
Will this be a bigger disaster than Solo?
>>825
>>826
Come again?
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>>828
Not joking. This is the fate of things.
>Dear sweet Kylo smell the flowers with me
>>825
>>829
>snook was a tranny
I'd be surprised if I didn't kind of already assume that. Pretty transphibicist of them to make a tranny the bad guy though.
>>829
So first cousin once removed wasn't enough incest for Disney. They had to have him fuck the (clone of) his great grandfather.
So what does /sw/ think of Adam Driver? Washington Post said that he’s the only one who had a career boost from this and I agree. I think it was his appearance on SNL that really sold him to people because it acknowledged how ridiculous his character was. Like, no one talks about Daisy Ridley, John Boogeywhatever, and the Poe Guy.
https://invidio.us/watch?v=FaOSCASqLsE
>>836
He might have, but only because with his face his career never had that high a hope.
>>836
havent heard much of daisy ridley outside of starwards

john bogeya has flatlined
oscar isaac has actually killed his career with starwars, he was in a fair bit of shit

yeh, adam driver is the only one whos been getting more and more parts since that first JJ starwars movie im not joking i forgot the name
>>836
>Adam Driver
Who is that again?
>>839
>Adam Driver
>Who is that again?
Discount Vader Jewface
>>841
Oh, Darth Slit Wrists. I honestly can't tell if he's a shit actor, the role he plays is shit or both.
>>842
He was in BlacKkKlansman and a zombie movie wtih Bill Murray. Some other stuff too according to his wiki. He’s definitely the best of the new ones.
Reviews are through the floor right now. All major sites are giving it ratings even lower than the prequels. IMDB has also hidden their rating score due to "too much negativity".
>>845
The only review I’ve read so far has been the Forbes one and that was scathing. Apparently even frozen 2 was better.
>>847
Archive of the Forbes review: http://archive.is/zfGWI
>The Rise of Skywalker is a bad movie and a miserable finale that serves no purpose other than to reassure adult fans of the original Star Wars that they are still the “chosen ones” of the pop culture galaxy.
>the 142-minute movie spends almost its entire running time retconning its predecessor and adding painfully conventional “plot twists” and patronizing reversals in the name of mollifying the fans who merely want to be reminded of the first three movies. It inflicts additional damage to the legacy of the first six Star Wars movies. It undermines the previous two “episodes” in the name of giving (some but not all) original-trilogy Star Wars fans a reassuring pat on the head. It even shies away from The Force Awakens’ darker real-world implications. It is so concerned with character reveals and “chase the MacGuffin” plotting that it finds no time for any real character work.
>The Rise of Skywalker is possibly worse than any prior Star Wars “episode.” It ends a legendary franchise with a thud while denying this new trilogy its artistic reason for existence. It represents the cultural theft of Star Wars from today’s kids by today’s arrested-development-stricken adults. Star Wars was a franchise first and foremost for children, and the kids who grew up with Harry Potter, The Hunger Games and the MCU have embraced harsh truths and challenging narratives
>one cannot escape the fact that Rise of Skywalker has turned this entire new Star Wars trilogy from a kids’ franchise into one aimed at nostalgic adults yearning for a time when they believed they were the most important generation.
Fucking brutal
>>850
I heard this guy wrote a rave review of TLJ, so it’s no wonder this one is so vitriolic.
>>700
I really hope you didn't go see it or I'm gonna reach through your screen and choke your bitch ass.
>>700
I don't care if this is bait or not, kill yourself.
>>700
>I'm going to give money to someone who hates me and have nothing in return
Just pay a hooker, at least you'd get some enjoyment in return.
>>806
No, that's the smallbrain take. What happened was that, in response to Plagueis attempting to artificially create life, the Force itself retaliated, and produced Anakin to bring the Sith down a couple notches.
>>867
>take
You talk like a faggot.
>>850
>Star Wars was a franchise first and foremost for children
Mendelson is full of horseshit.
>>873 My eyes can only process .webm posted here
>>814 Next time he is eating, go take a shit on his plate. If he does not appreciate the extra food you gave him he does not deserve the food he had before you shat on it.
>>873 Just started and it's already a terrible movie, moreso than I imagined. >>874 I'll get started converting it in a few hours. Don't expect anything HD.
What's the size limit on julay?
>>877 quick test points to around 20mb
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I'm really tired of all these black scientists in movies.
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Snekmonster is kinda hot. >>878 That's nice.
>>850 >The Force Awakens’ darker real-world implications Yes, because a stronk indumbpendint wymin who was sold into slavery as a child living by herself in a desert and not being used as some rich local's cum rag is super realistic. >Star Wars was a franchise first and foremost for children Yeah rampant limbs getting cut off, disemboweling animals and charred corpses on screen are really kid friendly. Anyone that uses the "BUT IT'S FOR KIDS" argument with Star Wars either never saw a SW movie or are choosing to be retarded. Just because something doesn't have rampant sex and cursing doesn't mean it's "for children."
>>881 Where are all the line breaks going? Why is every post in the past two hours on one line?
>>883 Test Test Reddit spacing
>>881 >Yeah rampant limbs getting cut off, disemboweling animals and charred corpses on screen are really kid friendly. Anyone that uses the "BUT IT'S FOR KIDS" argument with Star Wars either never saw a SW movie or are choosing to be retarded. Just because something doesn't have rampant sex and cursing doesn't mean it's "for children." well, kids need to learn to not play with laser swords. what better way to teach them then through a movie?
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>>883 Yeah it's just broken
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I can't take this seriously with that face
>>887 Does La'qeefa Gibswalker serve any purpose in the movie besides being a diversity hire?
>>888 She's a defector who knew Finn , who lives on the wide grassy plains of Endor with her horses (Endor is just like that now). So far she's been utterly insignificant, so yes, diversity hire.
>>890 Maybe she serves the purpose of milking horsecock with her asshole.
So they land the dropship of horses on the surface of a fucking ISD. Holy fuck that's retarded 1) The gun turrets could still shoot their ship sitting on the hull 2) the captain could just order a roll and make them all fall off.
>>894 >90lbs niggress >using bow and arrow >in a galaxy where laser guns are everywhere >uses it to shoot down a fucking space ship Disney actually paid JewJew to write this. Let that sink in.
>>895 I think it was a jetpack trooper, but it's still fucking retarded considering she went through the Resistance base, and therefore would have had access to real guns.
I'm confused by all these people dying and resurrecting each other. Why do they sometimes die and other times not?
>These ending shots Wait, so Palpy's planetkillers were already out and about in the galaxy, and just fucking explode for no reason? That's some real convenience there.
>>894 I saw some sceenshot leak where there was niggers on horse charging at something on top of a star destroyer or something. My guess is that jew jew asked "What was a great moment you like in tv/movie", and some random cuck said "niggers charging on something like in game of thrones". And then they put this inside the movie.
>No ahsoka Fine >No Falcon exploding damn, I kinda wanted that.
The only good part was the Hux betrayal subplot. It made sense, which is more than most Disney Wars can say for itself.
>>898 >just fucking explode for no reason Don't you understand you shitlord man baby? It was the power of Mary SueRay! She's the most powerful Jedi ever because The Force is female and you need to just accept it.
>>890 >She's a defector who knew Finn So is JarJar saying that all niggers know each other?
>>877 >>879 >>880 >>887 >>894 You fucking hero.
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>>899 It was in a trailer
>>873 dont know if its just me but I've got no audio.
>>910 Forgot to mention, the first fan reviews are in and it looks like a lot of shill reviews are trying to offset the awful critic reviews
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Well that was faster than Solo. I'll go make a new thread and link it around the place when I'm done.
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https://julay.world/sw/res/913.html WATCH-ALONG THREAD COMPLETED!
>>929 Thank you anon for you service!
>>825 Was Snoke secretly Kaetlinn Janner totally not related to Bruce Jenner, before Luke told him to stop mohlesting Kylo or something??
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Bet you feel real stupid now.
>>948 >86% >Audience Score >Verified Ratings: 7,246 I want to see those verifications.
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>>949 Here's some snippits of strings of high reviews. Clearly the people have spoken.
>>949 Rt is owned by disney this is a scam to get more asses in seats , since manipulating the professional critics was to obvious they are manipulating the audience score this time. >>950 At least 9 of those look like 1 liner bot responses... we shall see how this is received at in the next day or so. Also hi zach.
>>948 Why do you take such great pride in being the mouse's cocksucker?
>>952 Because you don't have any concept of this thing called "a joke."
>>953 But neither does Ruin Johnson, Krazy Kath Kennedy, Iger and Jar Jar Abraham..
>>881 A New Hope was made for a wide audience, including kids. But just like any other Hollywood flick, it still sneaks in gore and profanity to make it more edgy while appeasing older viewers.
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>>953 >merely pretending Fellate a shotgun
>>1012 >being sarcastic is "merely pretending" Technically correct but are you retarded?
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Feels bad, but at least it's over
>>1015 That image makes me sad. Fuck these shitty movies.
>>950 >i loved it >it was perfect >i am a long time fan >anyone that disagrees is a hater Reword and mix and match these talking points and you have just about every 5 star review there. But I'm sure it's just a (((coincidence.)))
>>1018 >Reword and mix and match these talking points I'll try. >>me love you long time >>it was perfect? disagrees! >>i am time >>anyone that is a fan hater
>>950 Wow, just look at all those clearly real persons.
>>825 >>826 >>829 That's... a very, very stupid hat.
>>1040 >hat That's not his tranny wig?
>>1049 On closer inspection it does indeed appear to be a hat
Consensus among normalfags is that JJ fixed every problem left by TLJ. Even worse, they're now fighting da powa sticking it to reviewers.
>>1080 >consensus You better have some sauce on that, nigga.
>>1080 So I rewatched TLJ in preparation for TRoS as all the reviewers were saying how insulting it was to it. It wasn’t nearly as bad as I remember and it is better directed than the prequels, but there were significant plot holes and lapses in judgement that interfered with how immersed I was. The prequels also added a lot more to the universe than the sequels. Rian’s not to blame for all of the issues, like the terrible character that is Kylo Ren, but I would say the majority of them are because of his script.
>>1084 And I might offend some people by saying this, but I think should happen is that they continue with Rian’s setup with Kylo being the bad guy in the next film and Rey has to bring balance to the force by ending the Skywalker line as they are too OP. She wouldn’t necessarily have to be a Chosen One, but I like that whole plot about Anakin being a proportional response to Plagueis’ meddling and now that this threat has passed with the Emperor’s death in Episode VI, they are no longer needed. Kylo’s weakness could be explained by his emotions and Rey, who would be a powerful Gray Jedi but have no where near as much potential as Kylo, would have to stop him before he goes nuclear.
>>1084 >So I rewatched TLJ >It wasn’t nearly as bad as I remember Oh no, it's retarded.
>be me about 4 months ago >have a post typed in 8/sw/ TOR thread about some stuff >site goes down while attempting to post >doesn't come back up >no backup board, cytube won't load for me for some reason >go to vch >find out that the vch board was there after several weeks because it wasn't actually on the vch board list due to just up and deciding to go to the front page on a whim and finding recent /sw/ posts there when I usually skip directly to /v/ >by then I have lots of stuff to do at work and don't have enough hours in the day to post on imageboards >eventually go back and find that the vch board is gone >where the fuck am I supposed to go now >eventually hear about julay >come here >Disney's latest faggot abomination is out now >rofl if anybody is actually paying to see this crap >spoilers are even shittier than I thought they'd be >movie is basically Rey stealing the entire history of the franchise after it was previously burned down >Jim still can't manage to get his rickety pig farm stable enough to actually post on despite having ostensibly been up for over a month 'Tis the season for more EU ripoffs and independent womyn. But at least the board survived. Here's to another SJW shitfest in the books and another batch of fans ready for actual quality content.
>>1087 >refound /sw/ just in time to be exposed to the cancer in movie form that is the ruse of soywoker I'm so sorry anon.
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>>1027 Real persons can tell a good end to a saga when they see one, after all.
>>1084 >>1085 This is pretty transparent retardation, anon.
>>767 Too obvious.

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